I had an epiphany. An epiphany that has fired up in me the desire to write. I have always loved writing but have never really done much of it. I think I may be half-decent at it, but I really don’t know. What if I blog and it’s a flop? Will it be a flop to everyone who reads it? Probably not. Somebody has to enjoy what I have to say, right? What will I write about? My kids? What’s so special about that? I mean, my kids are special to me, that goes without say. But millions of people have kids. My opinions? Same. Millions of people have opinions. I don’t want my blog to be a place that I bitch about things. Although, oddly enough, when something irks me that’s when I most want to sit down and write. And I imagine saying whatever it is that is driving me mad at the moment and everyone unanimously agreeing; I hear in my head, as I’m bitching in my head, people, but no-one in particular, frowning and all fired up right along with me,and saying, “yeah! I know, right? Who DOES THAT!!!???” and we all agree, but it’s ME who brings it up and summarizes it in to a nice neat little packaged bitchy story. But…would everyone agree? Or is everything that irks me in a moment necessarily blog-worthy? Probably not. So if I want to write, is it proper blog etiquette to randomly write about whatever I want? Or should I at least have my general theme narrowed down? I just don’t know. I really just don’t know. Oh yeah, back to the epiphany that lit the fire…
So I applied for a job and I know it would have been a job that this particular employer would have received many-an-applicant for. Several upon several for sure. I clearly stated in my cover letter that I had been out of the work force for five years (it would be job interview suicide to not disclose that, and why wouldn’t I disclose it?). So I fire off my resumé and cover letter almost on a whim I would say, because I didn’t bother to keep a copy of the job posting. Actually, even more clarification required here – I whimsically applied for two positions on that day for the same employer – one being a part-time position and one a full-time. So, yeah, I apply online, hit send, and carry on about my day, week, month. A month or so later I get a call inviting me for an interview. I was excited, flattered, impressed with myself, surprised and nervous (did I really want to go back to work?) They told me which particular position they were calling me for, but I couldn’t remember if it was the part-time or the full-time job. No matter. The interview was a week away. I geared myself up, rehearsing in my head the answers to the nonsensical ubiquitous interview questions. I pictured myself saying that my weakness was my interview skills and my strength was my ability to do the job. And then we would all laugh at that (it was to be a panel interview) and they would scribble down how they liked me right away, and we would carry on with the interview, and I would be just a bit more relaxed. What did I have to hide? If they asked me how I would handle a negative situation with a co-worker, no sweat, I would be honest. I get along with everyone and always have and am non-confrontational and handle negative situations quite positively, and so I would just be myself. Yeah, no. The woman who came to get me had three-inch heels on and short coiffed crunchy looking hair and the type of business attire that said “I am business woman and I am in charge of my business womaness.” And it was a panel interview all right. Four professional, very polished women sitting around a table. They introduced themselves and informed me of the interview format – they would go around the table and each ask me a question, and this would of course continue until all of their questions were used up. (Well, that’s not how she worded it). First question, manicured woman to my right, “Are you familiar with the [insert job-related acronym that I have no recollection of]?” Me, stumped. Honesty IS the best policy, always, right? “No, I’m sorry, I’m not familiar with that.” (Me thinking, “really? Jobs come with many acronyms that apply only to that particular role or company; is this really a reflection of my ability to do a job?”) To add salt to the wound, the second professional woman immediately follows with, “Oh, you didn’t look that up?” Me, “No.” Remember, I couldn’t have looked anything up – I didn’t keep a copy of the job description. I really didn’t think I would be called for an interview and coolly thought I would worry about it at the time if I did. At that point, I was thinking how I should probably just excuse myself right then, and leave. So instead of the five of us having a light-hearted laugh and the feeling that they had their candidate sitting right there in front of them, it was pretty much the polar opposite. Fast forward to the end of that interview (the Excel test did not go well either, by the way. More specifically, I couldn’t even remember enough Excel to finish the first part of my two-part Excel test, let alone begin part two. My typing speed is 80 wpm and that takes into account accuracy. Just sayin’.) They politely (polite yes, warm no) called me the next day to inform me they had chosen somebody else
So, I’m getting closer to the point of my story. Was I surprised that they had chosen another candidate? NOT IN THE LEAST. When I left that interview, instead of just thanking them for their time, I should have added that I’m sure I wouldn’t see any of them again. But I have to say I was annoyed. If they called me for an interview, they obviously felt I was qualified for the job, despite having been out of the workforce for five years. So why could they not have tailored their interview as such? It was the kind-of-sort-of role I have been doing for the past 23 years and there is no doubt in my mind that once I was trained I would have been more than capable. So I was bugged. Why call me and then interview me like another candidate who is currently working? We are not the same candidates! But then…it hit me!! The kind of job I have done for the most part for the past 23 years is not at all what I want to do if I ever get back into the job force. When I occasionally, randomly, capriciously apply for a job, it is that type of job title that draws me and only because that’s all I have ever done
So, I asked myself, ‘What would really make you happy if you had to do it all day long, or at least on a part-time basis?’ WRITE!! I want to write, damn it!! But I now direct you back to my opening paragraph, beginning with the fifth sentence. I did, however, manage to write quite a bit here. Maybe I will use this story as my starting point. I still don’t know about my blogability. But I guess if I want to write, I have to just let my pen flow and see where it takes me. And I do have to say thank you to those kind people for not offering me the job.